Paul McCartney has been chosen to sing at this year's Super Bowl halftime show. At a press conference, he was asked if there might be a "wardrobe malfunction." He said he doesn't really have a wardrobe to malfunction, so no worries on that front.
Now let me get this straight. They won't air the commercial with a quick
view of Mickey Rooney's backside, but they'll let Sir Paul out there naked for his entire set, without a wardrobe?

Since Sir Paul will be 64 in fewer than a few years, I imagine he might be thinking about adding the Beatles song "When I'm 64" to his solo sets. I wonder how much controversy would there be if he altered one lyric, so he sang, "Will you still need me, will you still breast-feed me, when I'm 64?"

Perhaps the most shocking thing Sir Paul could do would be, heaven forbid, to die to stage. Newspapers and magazines would be tempted to run certain types of headlines, but would worry they'd be accused of being tasteless and disrespectful. Headlines like, "Paul Is Dead-For Real This Time," "Paul Is Dead-Before 64", or "Paul Is Dead-More Than a Malfunction." They could more easily get away with it if people had already been shocked by his backup band Tavares launching into a version
of their hit "More Than A Woman," altered to "More Than a Malfunction."
I'd feel sorry for the ghost of Maurice Gibb being haunted by the alteration of his co-written lyric to "more than a malfunction to me."