What about The Stud and The Bitch

[JussiK]

After listening to the insipid ”Penthouse presents Mesdames Ce Soir” by The Love Symphony Orchestra ( the 2nd Love S Ork realese, from 1979, containing two side-long medleys of well done but pointless covers like ”In The Navy” and ”We Are Family” plus two useless originals ”Gold” and ”Deeper Than The Night”, but with a great ”Manhattan Disco Directory” printed on the back sleeve – plus the requisite pinup poster of course. The 3rd Penthouse label album with disco of sorts was the Galigula soundtrack), I remembered that ”The Stud” and ”The Bitch”, two uniquely British films and the complete adventures of disco entrepreneur extraordinaire Fontaine Khaled alias Joan Collins, mother, high class slut and drug addict, have been available on a single dvd realese for some time now . Despite memories of sitting in a theatre in 1978 totally bored during both I gave in last week and bought the damn thing to give them a second look. Upon it’s massively successful original realese ”The Stud” seemed already hideously dated, with worse dancing than in any of the Italian Saturday Night Fever rip-offs in the market in the fall of 1978. One of the main set pieces of the film has the crowd at Fontaine Khaled’s supposedly exclusive night club forming a ring around a thin, effeminate looking, wankishly smiling black guy who picks up the ladies around him one by one, leading them into the British variation of the hustle. While Odyssey’s ”Native New Yorker” plays, this person pushes and throws the less than glamorous gals around like in a rock’n roll contest, with sharp jerky movements that cause them to lose balance. After some five minutes of this, the clapping and whooping spectators finally join in the ”fun” and begin to bounce up and down frenetically. One couple is seen to continue to do the thing that passed for the hustle on most British floors: on count one bend your knees and twist your body slightly. On count two, straighten your knees robotically and twist your body slightly the other way. That was the footwork and the body moves. On the same count one, pull the right hand of your partner forcibly towards you and shove the other arm away from you. On count two, reverse this motion. That was known as the hustle. Couples simply stood in one place and pushed and shoved. Sometimes however, showoff types would strike a stagnant pose learned from the Travolta film that would break the knee-bending routine. Trendy magazines of the day used to instruct dancers to behave even more oddly with calculated jumps amid the ”hustling”. The Brits always danced very well solo but touch dancing was never a forte.

”The Stud” plays like an episode of a soap mixed with social drama based on the country’s still existing class divides. In a typical morality tale, unsophisticated working class Oliver Tobias has his hopes of making it big in the world of entertainment business crushed by the upper crust. Not quite as bad or boring at all as it first seemed, the film now comes across quite entertaining and well acted by it’s supporting cast of familiar faces from television. The middle-aged leads are a true horror, though, and the real reason to watch the stuff. They don’t give a good face and it’s bizarre how anyone would ever thought them to have charm, bankability or sex appeal. The cast is lit unappetisingly harshly, and the clarity of the dvd format allows you to gaze deep into the open pores of their pale and oily skins. The folds of the flesh are plentiful indeed, especially in the lame ”orgy” scenes during which fifty-somethings Joan Collins and Sue Lloyd bare their sagging torsos, along with a potbellied male participant who suddenly tries to bugger the Stud (Oliver Tobias, think of Warren Beatty after 3 years of heavy drinking) in a swimming pool.

The disco sequences are long, cheap and embarrassing. The first has Real Thing performing ”Let’s Go Disco” but this promise is ruined by the unappealing extras around them. The 2nd one has the horrible ”hustle” display and the third serves as the film’s grande New Year finale. Music-wise the best bit comes during the title character’s drive to the country, which is set to a great-sounding long version of the Biddu theme song, naturally not found on the Ronco label soundtrack album which sold millions. I’m convinced there are promo 12” gathering dust somewhere in North London.

”The Bitch” looks more authentically late-70’s with added silver overalls, sequined halter tops and more expensive neon lights for the disco scenes. The dancing is still awful and sex laughably tame, though I read that one member of the Finnish board of film censors thought the film was ”morally questionable” and that it should be allowed to be shown to adults only. The rest of the censors just thought it was stupid. – Buy the dvd, because though stupid as the films are, they’re very much worth watching repeatedly. There are all kinds of stuff to slap on your toast like snappy dialoque, the odd Baccara hit and the scene in which Joan Collins squrms around in heat in a limousine, opens her fur coat to reveal black see-thru bri-nylon underwear, arches her body madly upwards and practically rapes the Stud.

[QUINNY]

You're absolutely right.

They were 'old before their time' and were made for a decidedly middle aged audience (or so it seemed to anyone connected to Disco/clubs). Back then, British film makers were lucky to get anyone to appear nude or semi-nude, especially if they had a 'name'. Joan Collins was in a positively downward spiral when she did these and to a large extent they helped revive her career and give her the platform to go on and star in Dynasty (or whichever programme it was). I never thought she looked too bad in it and didn't her slightly less than perfect body (although who's to say that for a 40 something it was wasn't damned good?) enhance the drama and make it more believable? Although very soft porn, they were strangely erotic in places.

The original music was nothing more than instantly forgettable and looked upon by us as a bit of a joke (even though Biddu had achieved some status for earlier work), except maybe for the odd track (e.g. Olympic Runners) and even they haven't really stood the test of time. Otherwise, the tracklisting was typically Brit Disco, which at the time was appreciated, as other Disco films (SNF, TGIF etc) contained a large proportion of tracks that were totally foreign to us. There were one or two tracks that never belonged, but hey, even SNF and TGIF had those.

I guess it could be said that we had a less than charitable view of the films but they do hold a sweet spot somewhere in our psyche..

[DiscoMan]

I remember watching both films on U.S. cable TeeVee 20 years or so ago. Three things stand out in my memory: A swimming pool orgy and Joan Collins' tits... :lol:

[Videoskooter]

"The Stud" and "The Bitch" are both excellent pics to throw you back into the Seventies. All the ingredients are there: the clothes, the cars, the jewels, the attitude and the decadence.

BITD this was a scandalous movie for us Belgians. Porn was forbidden and the only way to see some humpin' in theatres were movies like these and stuff like "Erotica", filmed at the famous Raymond's Revue bar.

Joan Collins was perfectly casted, Oliver Tobias had flair and the orgies and sexscenes were pretty steamy.

The titlesong is a shameless copy of Cerrone's "Love in C minor" and the rest of the music is just atmospheric but certainly not mindblowing Disco.

I do own 'em both on DVD and I watch them frequently. They sure don't deserve Oscars or Baftas but as a frame of the good old days they stand the test :lol:

People who don't know what we're talking about:

http://www.celebsmovies-online.com/Joan-Collins/

[DiscoMan]

Videoskooter; how, when and where did you get 'em on DVD?

[Videoskooter]

how, when and where did you get 'em on DVD?

Both are released on DVD in the Benelux. They're in the catalogue from www.entertainmentplus.nl under "Seventies Classics".

Although they are still in the shops over here, their site doesn't seem to mention them at this moment.

They're the uncut versions, good image but the sound is not excellent.

They're also in stock:

HERE

[K-Bee]

Anyone ever bought the cologne advertised in the inner cover of the Stud soundtrack? :lol:

[Videoskooter]

K, does it have a name, coz' I don't have that sleeve?

[K-Bee]

It was called "Monsieur Le Stud" and they also did deodorants and After Shaves. It came in stylish packages with kinda in the same style as the LP front image.

I've been trying hard to find some info on the net about this but with no luck whatsoever :cry:

[nrgbeat]

I liked Joan when she was on "Dynasty" but then everything else I saw her in she played the same part. A rich broad with fancy clothes.

[Videoskooter]

I liked Johan when he was on "Dynasty"

Thx, I was pretty famous back then

K, I searched the net but I can't find a damn thing about that cologne :(

Maybe Marcio can give it a go! (Wow, I'm rapping :o )