The gay pride debate...

[Bernie]

On 2002-08-10 12:25, Rab wrote:

And as far as Markydefad's comment about Bernie being "STRAIGHT". With all due respect to Mr. Lopez, unless you know him personally you can't make that kind of conclusive remark.

I'm hetero and proud of it-I just don't make a big stink about it. I'm one of those "STRAIGHT" guys who gets along with everyone!

In fact I'm so tolerant of others that a few months back the author of "Hot Stuff-A Brief History of Disco" invited my girlfriend and I to a gay club here in DC for a retro Disco night and we actually had a good time. It was a little freaky at first, but it was fun.

[DanceMan]

Bernie....with all due respect....please refrain from using the word TOLERANT in regard to people of any race, religion, gender or sexual orientation....I don't want anyone to tolerate me...either like me for who I am or don't....I hear that word in regard to gay people so much. it is very insulting and reaks of condescension. I am sure that while that was not your intention, it is almost like saying that "some of my best friends are...."

[guille]

Getting back to gay parades this last one in San Francisco stirred up some controversy. It seems that they are leaving the political activism for greed and hunger for money. The organizers are more worried with getting the best bids from sponsors and advertising. There are still many things to fight for!!!
Enough said, I need to take this heat off me at the Watergarden... if you know what I mean.
Have a Disco Life.

[nrgbeat]

On 2002-08-10 21:37, DanceMan wrote:
Bernie....with all due respect....please refrain from using the word TOLERANT in regard to people of any race, religion, gender or sexual orientation....I don't want anyone to tolerate me...either like me for who I am or don't....I hear that word in regard to gay people so much. it is very insulting and reaks of condescension. I am sure that while that was not your intention, it is almost like saying that "some of my best friends are...."

I don't see a problem with the word tolerate.

For example if I work with a person who is always pushing their religious beliefs, I may not like that person, but I tolerate them.

[Jeff H]

Hey, guille--I hear ya! Have a blast... or two or three!

(You do, of course, open the debate about just how "mainstream" gays should become, but that's a topic for another thread, maybe not one to be discussed at this site.)

And DanceMan, I feel confident in saying that Bernie meant nothing patronizing by using the word "tolerant." Bernie is cool, and has demonstrated that many times. Relax!

[StuckIn1979]

Sorry, but Bernie's comment reaks of condescension. You are so proud to be straight, huh...Well, I guess it's OK for me to say I'm very proud to be WHITE!

How, can anyone who thinks they know so much about disco, that has been involved in the scene for so long, be so naive about gay clubs? Did you expect them to be that different??

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: StuckIn1979 on 2002-08-12 16:21 ]</font>

[NickNack]

On 2002-08-10 12:25, Rab wrote:
And as far as Markydefad's comment about Bernie being "STRAIGHT"...

Unless, you actually see who someone is sleeping with you can't be sure.

Sorry, Rab, but this comment doesn't work for me. Who you 'sleep' with doesn't determine your sexuality.

If I NEVER slept with another man, I would still be gay the day I died. And if Bernie divorced tomorrow and swore off women, he would still be straight. Those people who are celibate don't toss away their sexual nature. They're just not living it physically. Doesn't change who or what they are BEFORE they became celibate.

One last note: Although you started your paragraph with, "With all due respect to Bernie...", I want to commend him for not going off. Do you find it necessary to go into the bedrooms of all your friends and acquaintances before you decide if they're telling you the truth about their sexuality? You off-handedly make an assumption Bernie could be lying. Why and what for escapes me. No, I haven't met Bernie personally, but I hope to change that in the future. In the meantime, I think I can give the man more than the benefit of a doubt in whatever he says and does. He's more than proven himself to those of us who have been here longer than five minutes!

Now, I'm going the **** to bed, wishing I hadn't signed on this evening. ANYBODY WANT TO WATCH? :roll:

[markydefad]

I typed a response to Rab's post on Saturday morning. When I submitted the post, I lost it all. I figured maybe it was for the better. It's been so peaceful around here and people have been playing Maarten's brilliant Disco relay game together so well, that I didn't really wanna get into it with anyone.

But, I want to put in a good word for Bernie here because as Nicky and Jeff have said previously, he has been exemplary in his dealings with everyone here--gay and straight, black and white, male and female, etc. He's always taken the high road whenever a dispute arose and I've never seen him pull any punches.

So I can't find any reason to give him a hard time over anything he's said here.

I'm grateful he's created this forum for us to connect. His private life is just that--private. None of my business.



_________________
Make My Feet Wanna Dance!

Markydefad

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: markydefad on 2002-08-12 21:51 ]</font>

[DanceMan]

Yes...I would also like to be added to the cheering section on Bernie....

Although I took him to task over the "tolerant" word, in no way diminishes the admiration and support that he deserves and will continue to receive from me now and in the future for all that he has done for disco.....I think that this site is one of the best created EVER and most all the credit goes STRAIGHT to Bernie (sorry, I couldnt resist!)....Much Thanks, pal.

[Blaxman]

On 2002-08-12 16:13, StuckIn1979 wrote:

How, can anyone who thinks they know so much about disco, that has been involved in the scene for so long, be so naive about gay clubs?

Well, I'm on the disco scene since 1977 and I'm completely naive about gay clubs!! What is the problem about it?
I know gay people, I have freindship with some gay people, and I exchange my opinions, here in this site, with gay people. Why should I know what they do into their clubs? To me it is completely irrelevant!!

Also, I didnt see anything wrong to be proud of what you want. Wrong is somebody that thinks they are better than others. Whatever their color, sexuality, nationality, etc....

Peace to you all

[Bernie]

When I first saw Rab's comment to Marky about me I thought to myself, "what is this?" Being that I was getting ready to leave for a weekend trip I simply typed a quick and light-hearted note to set the record straight. It was not meant to offend or imply that I was better than anyone else. I apologize if anyone felt otherwise.

And yes, I am very naive about gay Disco and no, I never said I knew everything about Disco. That's why I read and learn from posts from the gay, black and overseas members... In fact when I interviewed Nicky a year or two back I had him clarify certain gay terms and his experiences for me so I could understand his story better. I'm never too big to say I don't know and am always willing to make new friends from different cultures and lifestyles.

This site has helped me greatly in that respect. Just because my upbringing and schooling prevented me from meeting different people/cultures doesn't mean I can't do it now.

[Jeff H]

On 2002-08-13 10:05, Bernie wrote:
when I interviewed Nicky a year or two back I had him clarify certain gay terms

What do you mean by "certain gay terms," Bernie?!!

Your comment reeks with the stench of a member of the patriarchal establishment attempting to further disenfranchise a minority!!! What is wrong with the way gay people speak?!! We oppressed (but fabulous) peoples will no longer be crushed beneath the heel of your heterosexist liguistic superiority!!!

So there, girlfriend!

[Blaxman]

Jeff, I cant speak for Bernie, but what I understand about that he said is:

gay terms = gay slangs

it could be said:

engineer terms = engineer slangs

It's all about slangs (I think). Not the way of life or something.

At least to me, like a stranger, is really hard to understand some slangs, in fact its hard even in my own country!! :lol:

There is a topic here in this forum dealing exactly with this matter. Take a look!

Peace

[markydefad]

Blax--Jeff was being facetious,.... er...sarcastic... er..tongue-in-cheek, uh.... just kidding!!! :lol:

Does that translate???

With this international forum here, it can sometimes get a little dicey (tricky) with translating sarcastic remarks.

Sirius seems to think I was making fun of him with my Amanda Lear fan club president remark. NO--just a joke.

Some guy who was looking for a song and then found it himself read me the riot act after I quoted Billie Holiday ("God bless the child that finds his own")to him. He thought I was implying that he knew the song all along and was just testing us????!!!
No, just praising your resourcefulness!!!!

Anyhoo...(I like that, sorry if it's working your nerves

[Bernie]

On 2002-08-13 10:23, Jeff H wrote:

On 2002-08-13 10:05, Bernie wrote:
when I interviewed Nicky a year or two back I had him clarify certain gay terms

What do you mean by "certain gay terms," Bernie?!!

Your comment reeks with the stench of a member of the patriarchal establishment attempting to further disenfranchise a minority!!! What is wrong with the way gay people speak?!! We oppressed (but fabulous) peoples will no longer be crushed beneath the heel of your heterosexist liguistic superiority!!!

So there, girlfriend!

Actually, "girlfriend" was one of the temrs Nicky cleared up for me!

[Blaxman]

On 2002-08-13 10:56, markydefad wrote:
Blax--Jeff was being facetious,.... er...sarcastic... er..tongue-in-cheek, uh.... just kidding!!! :lol:

Does that translate???

With this international forum here, it can sometimes get a little dicey (tricky) with translating sarcastic remarks.

Sirius seems to think I was making fun of him with my Amanda Lear fan club president remark. NO--just a joke.

Some guy who was looking for a song and then found it himself read me the riot act after I quoted Billie Holiday ("God bless the child that finds his own")to him. He thought I was implying that he knew the song all along and was just testing us????!!!
No, just praising your resourcefulness!!!!

Anyhoo...(I like that, sorry if it's working your nerves

Marky, I've realized Jeff could be joking just "AFTER" I posted my reply!! What confused me was that "MAD" face he added.
What a jerk I am!! :lol:

Anyway, my intention was just to help, not to fight with Jeff.

And what you said about the foreigners is true. Maybe it could be called:

The TOWER OF BABEL effect!!! :lol:

Peace




_________________
SENHORES DO GROOVE - BRAZIL

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Blaxman on 2002-08-13 11:15 ]</font>

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Blaxman on 2002-08-13 11:16 ]</font>

[Jeff H]

Sorry for the confusion, Blax.

I guess sarcasm is not the international language, huh?

But maybe disco music is, OK... girlfriends?! :lol:

[Blaxman]

Jeff, I'm not so sure what this "girlfriends" means, but.....it's OK! (help me God!!) :lol:

Peace

[NickNack]

On 2002-08-13 12:13, Blaxman wrote:
Jeff, I'm not so sure what this "girlfriends" means, but.....it's OK! (help me God!!) :lol:

Peace

Blax,

LMAO:

[markydefad]

Hear!!! Hear, Nicky!!!!!

Blax is a great sport, I totally agree.

Now, Nicky please "sexplain" (My typo, BUT very interesting , doncha think?) explain the term "girlfriend " to him.

Blax, we didn't use these terms back in St. Olaf (my fictional homeplace) either. I NEVER referred to a guy as a "She" until after I worked many months at Aloha Records. Everyone there talked like that. "Who does "she" think "She" is? and "Get Her" when they were talking about other men (Gay men, mostly).

I thought it was "most distasteful" --BUT later--finally accepted the humor in it. AND look at me now, GIRLFRIENDS!!!!!! :razz:

[Jeff H]

I NEVER talk that way either.

Except around my girlfriend Marky, of course. You know her? Miss Thing...?

:lol: :lol: :lol:

[Blaxman]

Marky, Nicky and Jeff.

Thank you all for help me on this language matters.

As time goes by, I'm pretty much close to understand what do you say.........apparently!! :lol:

Peace

[DanceMan]

There is a great flashback book, if it is still in print, entitled, The Queen's Vernacular...it is like the Bible of Gaydom and is thick and really long (hmmmm...) to read. I saw it a number of years ago, and had no idea what 90 per cent of the book was referring to as much of it was written about the language that was really buried and since lost in the underground bar scenes back in the 40's and 50's era, like " are you a friend of Dororthy's" - a password/code to gain you access into a gay bar. I think most gayspeak is kinda outmoded in that sense now, as more and more folks are OUT and don't have to hide anymore and if the language is used at all, most times it is used to get a jolt out of a non-gay person or for laughs among friends...as we do here!