Handling Anger

Discussion on Handling Anger within the Politics, Religion, Philosophy, Profound Current Events... forums, part of the Non-Music Discussions category; If someone pisses you off,let's say a co-worker are you more likely to: a)Shrug it off and not say anything ...


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  #1  
Old June 3rd, 2002, 04:00 PM
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If someone pisses you off,let's say a co-worker are you more likely to:

a)Shrug it off and not say anything even though you are really pissed off, but you don't want to make a scene.

b)Tell the person off in a confrontational manner.

c)Tell the person in a firm but polite way that you didn't appreciate the way they treated you.

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: nrgbeat on 2002-06-04 06:28 ]</font>
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  #2  
Old June 3rd, 2002, 05:09 PM
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Definitely answer A, but I would also ruthlessly mock them behind their backs.

Example: a few months ago, I had two co-workers one aisle over from me, who frequently had loud conversations on the phone, always bitched about how much everything sucked, and blasted this little space heater all the time even though the office was already stifling. I dubbed them "The Thermo Queens".

One day, I was having a conversation with my boss, and, being a somewhat "animated" conversationalist, I was a bit louder than usual. One of them came over and gave me this snotty lecture about how she was trying to concentrate, and then asked me to "keep the drama down". I said sure, not a problem.

The next day I made up a little sign and hung it above my desk. It read:

REMEMBER:
Keep the drama down!

A couple of weeks went by until she eventually saw it. She and the other Thermo Queen confronted me about how "we are all adults", told me to grow up, and -- out of all things -- she told me to "show some respect" for others. They complained to my boss about the sign, so he reluctantly told me to take it down.

The next day, I put up a sign that just said

REMEMBER:
with a picture of Aretha Franklin underneath.

The joke was lost on them, so a few days later, I put up a sign that said the same thing as the original, but in Japanese (thanks to Babelfish translator). Every week or so, I'd change the sign, but I would still have some veiled reference to drama or heat. This went on for several months, until they were both laid off.
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  #3  
Old June 3rd, 2002, 06:21 PM
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Quote:
On 2002-06-03 17:09, Graham Start wrote:
Definitely answer A, but I would also ruthlessly mock them behind their backs.
_____________________________________________
Graham, my grouchy pal-- bitchy comments like this are why I loves ta read yer stuff. We are dangerously close in temperament.
______________________________________________

REMEMBER:
with a picture of Aretha Franklin underneath.
_____________________________________________

Why NOT Mary J."No More Drama" Blige posters?
Or a Glenn Frey "The Heat Is On" picture cover?
_____________________________________________

The joke was lost on them, so a few days later, I put up a sign that said the same thing as the original, but in Japanese (thanks to Babelfish translator). Every week or so, I'd change the sign, but I would still have some veiled reference to drama or heat. This went on for several months, until they were both laid off.
_____________________________________________

It's a good thing WE don't work in the same office. I don't think I'd be a match for you. I have the market cornered on snarky imitations and cruel mockery of co-workers AND impossible clients in MY office.

It's Good To BE KING and/or QUEEN... or so I've heard.
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Old June 3rd, 2002, 07:00 PM
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Hello nrgbeat, I would go with 'b' minus the 'start an argument'. It's been awhile since I've hit anyone but it would be nice to have a 'Golden Gloves' flashback . All the best, DJ Phil PS. I like the replies about 'signs' (in non-english) to get back at a co-worker!!!!!!
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Old June 4th, 2002, 02:26 AM
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I don't have a job, but seeing that in the workplace I would have to try and behave myself or get the sack, I would choose option "A" first, if the person still gives me the shits then I would go for option "C" and if they keep on pissing around with me then I would take this matter to the boss. I would only choose option "B" outside the workplace to deal with the arsehole pissing me off.
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Old June 4th, 2002, 06:33 AM
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Tell the person in a firm but polite way that you didn't appreciate the way they treated you.
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Old June 4th, 2002, 09:43 AM
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Quote:
On 2002-06-03 18:21, markydefad wrote:

Why NOT Mary J."No More Drama" Blige posters?
Good one, but I wasn't that familiar with the song at the time. After all, I don't do radio or TV anymore.

Quote:

It's a good thing WE don't work in the same office. I don't think I'd be a match for you. I have the market cornered on snarky imitations and cruel mockery of co-workers AND impossible clients in MY office.
Hee hee :lol:, our combined forces could probably do some serious damage. Just imagine...
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Old June 4th, 2002, 01:50 PM
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Question Graham.

Technophobe that I am...why when I was replying to your post, do my responses all get shrunk to the size of the quote, except for the final one? I'm trying to learn how to do new things...BUT I always look retarded when I try something new.

Help, PLEASE.
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  #9  
Old June 4th, 2002, 02:06 PM
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Does the answer to Marky's question have anything to do with where the [quote] and [quote/] (end quote) markers are placed?

You're not alone, Marky--I can't figure out a lot of this cybercrap either.


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Old June 4th, 2002, 02:11 PM
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Oops--I guess "end quote" is actually [/quote]

See what I mean? :lol:
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Old June 4th, 2002, 03:11 PM
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Quote:
On 2002-06-04 13:50, markydefad wrote:
Question Graham.

Technophobe that I am...why when I was replying to your post, do my responses all get shrunk to the size of the quote, except for the final one? I'm trying to learn how to do new things...BUT I always look retarded when I try something new.

Help, PLEASE.
Because you typed all your responses before the "end quote". Whenever you want to quote someone piecemeal, you need to add the appropriate start and closing headers, just like with italics and bold text. Unlike italics/bold though, you can "nest" additional quotes like this:


Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
On 2002-06-02 13:49, The Bull Terrier said:

What's the problem? The sign is there to remind me that I get a little loud at times, and that as you suggested, I need to 'keep the drama down'. Isn't that what you asked?
On 2002-06-02 13:50, Thermo Queen 1 said:

Like, whatever. Look, we don't have to take this sort of nonsense. Like, high school is over, and like, we're all adults here. So, like, just show a little respect, okay?
On 2002-06-02 13:51, The Bull Terrier said:

My sentiments exactly!
A final postscript: the Thermo Queens are gone, the office has moved, but my screensaver still says:

REMEMBER: You don't need to keep the drama down anymore!
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  #12  
Old June 4th, 2002, 05:25 PM
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The older I get, the shorter my temper is so my answer would be B! Some things need to be handled abruptly with verbal force to make sure that person dosen't try that shit again!
Then there were times that they were heated debates/complaints in the supervisor's office. So it depends on the situation.

What if your boss goes too far???? I had a situation years ago with my ex-boss. She had two daughters that she COULD NOT CONTROL and would boss her around. So the bitch got the nerve to come to work and play "ATILLA THE HUN" with all the employees. She had a problem with yelling at people and waving her finger in someone's face. She decided to try me one morning and almost got her ass kicked! After that day I NEVER had any problems from that wench!

*DISCO DELIGHT*
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Old June 4th, 2002, 09:23 PM
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Quote:
On 2002-06-04 17:25, HustleBaby wrote:

What if your boss goes too far???? I had a situation years ago with my ex-boss. She had two daughters that she COULD NOT CONTROL and would boss her around. So the bitch got the nerve to come to work and play "ATILLA THE HUN" with all the employees.
*DISCO DELIGHT*
You just singled out the reason why so many people are so unpleasant to deal with in the first place -- they either don't feel they have control over their own lives and/or they resent something in themselves, so they've got to take it out on everyone else.

And while I can make anyone who is at my level wish they'd never disturbed me, I tend to be pretty meek when this happens from someone higher up. So HustleBaby, you get my personal praise for having the guts to stand up to this kind of crap. YOU RULE!
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Old June 7th, 2002, 09:23 PM
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I believe one of the reasons my former employer "asked me to leave" is because I, like HustleBaby, go with 'B'. I don't have time for corporate BS and am not into politics. Kissing butt because you make more money than I do or have a higher title is not part of my job description. Is 'B' the "right way" to handle things? Maybe not, but as one of my former coworkers pointed out, my attitude sure keeps my blood pressure in line.
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  #15  
Old June 10th, 2002, 01:00 AM
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Graham & NickNack

I've learned over the years that people will walk over you if you allow them to. Plus I learned the hard way years ago that people take kindness for weakness. Once I realized that, my kindness (towards undesireables)went out the window. I don't give a damn if it is the boss, he's not GOD he's a person just like the rest of us. I've seen bosses send employees to the bathroom in tears or near asthma attacks after they verbally attacked them. THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL I'M GONNA ALLOW THAT SHIT TO HAPPEN TO ME! Like NickNack said answer "B" may not always be the correct approach but your blood pressure will stay down.

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