What sort of comedy mock/sketch shows do you's like?

[Funky Dude]

I'm a big fan of comedy sketch/mock shows that take the piss out of stars, politicians, TV commercials and arseholes that eveyone hates.

Anyhow in Australia we use to have this piss funny show called "Full Frontal" use to be called "Fast Forward". Anyhow this show is a comedy sketch/mock show that has funny sketches and a lot of it was making fun of TV commercials and movie/sport/TV stars, shows and best of all Australian politicians. IT WAS THE BEST. Anyhow I'll mention some of the funny sketches:

TV ad "Backwash" - This was a made up commercial which was about selling a drink with spit, anyhow from memory there were these people in a pub or shop and they were sick of drinking the same old drinks and asked for something new, anyhow this fat bloke behind the counter wearing a singlet pulled out a bottle of some liquid and spat in it and says "Here try some Backwash" and I almost puked as there were chunks in the drink, anyway the advertiser says "Backwash contains glucose, sugar (etc)..... and the most important ingrediant of all, OTHER PEOPLE'S SPIT!" :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: . That sketch was hilarious.

TV show parody "I Love Pauline" - This is a parody of the old time favourite "I Love Lucy" show, but Pauline Hanson (former Australian one nation politician) as Lucy and Johnny Howard (Australian Prime Minister) as Ricky. Anyhow this sketch was piss funny, it had Pauline saying her classic phrase "I don't like it" and Johnny going on about GST in the show. One time Johnny goes "I've just got the baby to sleep, I didn't even have to mention my G-G-G-GST to him" :lol: .

TV show parody "Telly Stubbies" - This is a piss funny parody of the kids show "Telly Tubbies". Anyhow the Tele Stubbies looked similar to the Telly Tubbies but intstead of antennas on their heads, they had beer taps on their heads and beer brands on their suits such as VB (Victoria Bitter), Fosters Lager, Tooheys Draft and I guess the other one had Light Ice. Stubby in Australia means beer and also short workmans/footy shorts. Anyhow it starts off with "Time for Telly Stubbies, Time for Telly Stubbies" and the sun does a really loud burp :lol: , then the narrator goes "Oh dear, it looks like the Telly Stubbies just got kicked out of another pub" and when they are kicked out they get up to all sorts of trouble stealing from stores, getting into fights etc...

TV show parody of "Judge Judy" - This parody is still called "Judge Judy" but has a bunch of funny twists to it. One of the sketches of this was this man was sueing Ritchie Benaud (Australian cricket commentator) because he bought Ritchie's auto biography book and got bored shitless reading it. Anyway he says to Judy "He's book goes on and on and on" and when Ritchie tells one of his boring cricket stories Judy goes (these aren't in the exact words) "Oyoyoyoy , I've never heard such a tedious boring man in my life, I'll sentence you to read your own book" and Ritchie goes "oh good I'll start with chapter one" and the man goes "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" and Judy goes "Read it at home!!!". Damn I love that sketch :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: .

TV ad "Demtel steak knives" - This parody takes the piss out of Tim Shaw from Demtel advertising steak knives. Anyhow in the Demtel ads Tim always goes blah blah blah "And there's more", blah blah blah "And theres STIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLL more", blah blah blah "And I KNOW you want more", this bloke is a real cracker :lol: . Anyhow Full Frontal took the piss out of this ad and Tim Shaw advertises the steak knives demonstrating them cutting non food objects and he uses "And there's more.... but there's STIIIILLL MORE" and then he throws in an aftershave knife and a few other knives and he goes "and I know you want MORE!!!!!" :lol: :lol: :lol: and some bloke throws a knife at his back to shut him up :lol: . There was also another sketch where Tim Shaw tries to chat up a chick and when he introduces himself to her he tells about himself blah blah blah "but there's more" blah blah blah "But there's STILLLLLLL MORE!!!" blah blah blah "but I KNOW you want more" blah blah blah, then he demonstrates how this steak knive can cut wood and he goes under the table and cuts the leg off the table and the table falls on top of him :lol: .

Movie star "John Claud Van Dan" - This is where John Claud chucks tantrums. Anyhow some the sketches are "John Claud Van Dan trying to speak English", "John Claud Van Dan trying to share a flat" etc... and in each sketch the people laugh at him and he goes "Are ya laughter-crackin' at me, ARE YOU LAUGHTER-CRACKIN' AT ME???..... RRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!" :lol: :lol: and John Claud beats the living crap out of the people, also there was this sketch where a Kookaburra (Australian native bird) was laughing at him and he gets pissed off and goes "Are ya laughter-crackin' at me, ARE YOU LAUGHTER-CRACKIN' AT ME???..... RRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!" and beats up the Kookaburra. That's a classic.

"Fabio" - a parody of some bloke who claims he's the most beautiful man in the cosmos. Anyhow this is where he's on his website on a computer and he goes "I'm Fabio, the most beautiful man in the cosmos" and keeps on yacking about crap of how good he is and then some Gorilla/Ape appears and whacks Fabio on the head with a shovel. In all of these sketches that same Gorilla appears and whacks him in the head with a shovel :lol: .

TV show "Welcome Back Kotter" - they also take the piss out of comedy classics too. Anyhow in this sketch Arnold Horshack goes "OOOO OOOO OOOO MR KOTTER MR KWOTTER MR KWWWOOTTTEER" and Kotter goes "What Arnold", and Arnold goes "Oh nothing" :lol: :lol: :lol : .

TV cooking show "Consuming Passions" - this is a parody of this 5 minute cooking show "Consuming Passions" which is usually on in the arvo. Anyhow in the actual show this guy cooks some delicious healthy meals and has a glass of wine to suit the occasion. The Full Frontal parody exaggerates the show with the wine, the bloke makes a meal and has a drink of wine after demonstrating every step in cooking, then he pours wine into the food he's cooking to ad flavour, after so many glasses he gets totally shitfaced and his voice gets all slurred and he's all sweaty and falls over :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: .

Song parody "Pretty Crap For A PM (Prime Minister)" - This is a parody of Offsprings "Pretty Fly For A White Guy". In this clip there are a bunch of Pauline Hansons singing "Give it to me Johnny" and Johnny Howard Australian Prime Minister goes "Uh huh, uh huh" and the Paulines go "Give it to me Johnny" and John Howard goes "I'm pretty crap for a PM". I've forgotten most of the lyrics to the song but it's about how crap John Howard is with the GST and other things and it's PISS FUNNY :lol: :lol: :lol: .

TV ad "Mac Donalds" - This is where some bloke drives to a prison in the desert while the song "Sunshine Of My Smile" by Cream is playing and he gets out of the car and munches on a Maccas burger and then Colonel Sanders (Kentucky Fried Chicken) shoots the burger out of the bloke's hand with his shotgun :lol: . And there are a few other of sketches of this ad.

And there are loads more funny sketches in it.

So what's your favourite mock/sketch comedy show that takes the piss out of ads, stars, politicians etc...? And tell us some funny sketches on them, I love to hear them.

[jack]

[quote]
On 2002-09-18 11:05, Funky Dude wrote:
I'm a big fan of comedy sketch/mock shows
TV cooking show "Consuming Passions" - this is a parody of this 5 minute cooking show "Consuming Passions" which is usually on in the arvo.
funky dude---that is quite a posting ! some bits "read" funny..some i think "you had to be there" ...and some of ur aussie slang has me scratching my head...what the heck is "arvo" ?????

[paul]

I love "The Phil Hendrie Show." It's a radio show based in LA and available on the net. I just love the satire. I also liked Chris Rock, Saturday Night Live ('75 to some '90s stuff), George Carlin, Richard Pryor's TV and live performances and Cedric "The Entertainer."

[Funky Dude]

jack wrote:
funky dude---that is quite a posting ! some bits "read" funny..some i think "you had to be there" ...and some of ur aussie slang has me scratching my head...what the heck is "arvo" ?????

"arvo" is slang in Australia for "afternoon", this slang word is normally used in Aussie speech eg. "Hey, I'm going down to me mate's this arvo!" . As for the word "bloke", you might already know what that means but just in case you don't it's slang for "man", I'm pretty sure this word is used in UK as well. Anyhow here's a link to an Australian slang dictionary which will tell you what most of the Aussie slang words mean http://www.koalanet.com.au/australian-slang.html

<<<Warning some of this Aussie slang you's might find really offensive>>>>

BTW what bits make you think I been there?

[nrgbeat]

"I'm sitting here with a gutful of piss from drinking amber fluid. Now, I've got to go to the loo and liquid laugh."

Translation in English:

"I'm sitting here drunk from drinking beer. Now I've go to go the bathroom and vomit."

[Funky Dude]

nrgbeat wrote:
"I'm sitting here with a gutful of piss from drinking amber fluid. Now, I've got to go to the loo and liquid laugh."

Translation in English:

"I'm sitting here drunk from drinking beer. Now I've go to go the bathroom and vomit."

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Mate, this is English, English Australian that is :lol: .

Just kidding :lol: :lol: :lol: .

To be honest I haven't exactly heard people say half of the slang words you put into a phrase. Maybe that sort of slang is used among ockers at local pubs but I don't go to pubs so I wouldn't know. I guess how I would probably say this phrase is:

"I'm sitting here totally pissed on grog. Now I have to go to the dunny and chuck up."

Hey NRG, could you throw us some more phrases using the Aussie words from that list, and then do an English translation? This is rather fun :lol: .

[nrgbeat]

I'm at the beach watching white pointers and about to crack a fat.

Translation in American:

I'm at the beach watching topless sunbathers and getting aroused.

[Funky Dude]

Hey, that's a good one.

Now try and translate this into English American:

I've just drove home in my ocker machine, totally stuffed after a full day's hard yakka. On the way home I stopped at the local grog shop and bought a slab of VB for me and me mates. Anyhow called me mates up to come over watch the footy with me. We were watchin' footy on TV while getting ourselves pissed on VB and downing trays and trays of meat pies. Me mates just left totally shitfaced and I'm too whacked to get up and turn off the TV. The next morning I wake up still whacked after last night and I staggered around the house trippin' over tinnies and slippin' over half-eaten pies and go outside staggering around like a total unco until I found the thunderbox. Opened the door and fell over with my head slumped in the shitbowl, then I was doing my morning technicolour yawn.

Don't worry I don't live that sort of lifestyle, I don't even drink, this is just a scenario I made up for you to decipher :lol: :lol: :lol: .

Have fun :lol: .

[nrgbeat]

I've just drove home in my ocker machine,
I just drove home in my old car
totally stuffed after a full day's hard
totally tired after a full day's hard work.
yakka. On the way home I stopped at the local grog shop and bought a slab of VB for
I stopped at the liquor store and bought some beer for me and my friends.
me and me mates. Anyhow called me mates up to come over watch the footy with me. We were watchin' footy on TV while getting ourselves pissed on VB and downing trays and trays of meat pies. Me mates just left totally shitfaced and I'm too whacked to get
My friends just left totally drunk and I'm too drunk ?? to get up and turn off the tv.
up and turn off the TV. The next morning I wake up still whacked after last night and I staggered around the house trippin' over tinnies and slippin' over half-eaten pies and go outside staggering around like a total unco until I found the thunderbox.
I go outside and stagger around like a total jerk until I found the outhouse.
Opened the door and fell over with my head slumped in the shitbowl, then I was doing my morning technicolour yawn.
Opened the door and fell over with my head slumped on the toilet bowl, then I threw up.

[Funky Dude]

Well done nrg!

I thought you'd have a bit of trouble getting around some of my slang as a lot of it ain't from the Aussie slang list website link. And you managed to get around a bunch of slang by simplifying the storyline. Anyhow I thought I'd give some definitions of the slang words (you already know half of them):

Ocker machine - 1970's Holden Kingswood Ute/Sedan, a stereotypical car for pub ocker/yobbos


Kingswood Ute (late 70s)



Kingswood sedan (1973)

Now here's REAL ocker machine :lol: (either a holden or a ford dated 1960's):





stuffed - tired/worn out

hard yakka - hard work

grog shop - bottle shop

slab of VB - 24 pack of cans of Australian brand of beer "Victoria Bitter"


mate - friend/buddy

footy - football (Australian Rules Football such as AFL/Rugby League/Rugby Union)

Pic above - AFL game (Australian Football League)

pissed - drunk

downing - eating lots and lots

shitfaced - drunk

whacked - drunk/tired/out of energy

tinnies - beer cans

unco - uncoordinated

thunderbox - outdoor toilet (particularly an old dirty outdoor wooden toilet that hasn't been washed or emptied in years)

shitbowl - toilet bowl

technicolour yawn - vomit

Half of the slang used I didn't pick from that Aussie slang list.

Anyhow now here's another challenge, try and translate that story into American slang.

Have fun :lol:

_________________
Australia mate! The land of many great funkateers!

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Funky Dude on 2002-09-23 00:54 ]</font>

[nrgbeat]

I decided to give you a sample of some slang.
See if you can translate this:

One night me and my homies from the hood cruised down to the local bar to check out some foxy mamas and have a few brewskis. I was checking out da ass of one of these hot mamas when her big poppa catches me looking and tries to start a fight with me.

I said listen dude everythings tight. Just chill out bro. This only made the dude more pissed off and he was cursing me big time and making a scene.

I was really wasted by now and was cursing right back when all of a sudden this guido hits me in the face. This started a brawl in the bar with chairs flying and bottles crashing.

Next thing you know the cops came and we were busted. I didn't get any ass that night, but things change and now that chick is my baby's mama.<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: nrgbeat on 2002-09-23 21:04 ]</font>

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: nrgbeat on 2002-09-23 21:25 ]</font>

[Funky Dude]

Translation in English:

One night me and my friends from the neighbourhood drove down to the local bar to check out some really sexy ladies and have a few alcoholic drinks. I was checking out the buttocks of one of these sexy girls when her husband caught me looking and tries to start a fight with me.

I said "Listen, you have nothing to worry about. Please settle down." This only made him more angry and he was swearing at me out loud so everyone could hear.

I was really drunk by now and was swearing back at him when all of a sudden he punched me in the face. This started a major brawl in the bar with people throwing chairs and bottles.

Next thing you know, the police came in and arrested us. I didn't get together with any girls that night, but things have changed because now that girl is my girlfriend/fiance/wife and we raised a child.

That's my interpretation of it. Next post I'm going to do an Aussie slang version of it that story.

[Funky Dude]

Translation in Aussie slang:

One night me and my mates drove down to the local pub to check out some sheilas and have a few stubbies. I was checking out the arse on this sheila when her bloke caught me perving and tries to have a blue with me.

I said "Maaaaaaaate!!! It's okay, I ain't gonna steal your sheila from ya! Calm down mate! This only made the yobbo more pissed and he was really slagging off at me and making a total dickhead of himself.

By now I was totally pissed after a slab and we were having a slagging match when all of a sudden this wanker belts me in the chops. This started a big blue in the pub as the yobbos were brawling pegging tinnies and stubbies and chairs at each other.

Next thing you know the coppers came in and dragged us down to the cop shop and slapped the charges on us. I didn't get a root that night, but things have changed because that sheila is now my little sport's mother.